"In Darkness a Light Shines on Me"

I am a coffee drinking , out of key singing , 5 foot tall Wild Thing . I am a mother to a daughter , a list maker and a Sailor's wife . This is my little corner of the internet where I write about being a Stay at Home Wife and Mom , a talentless crafter , an aspiring writer , a struggler with mental health , a music lover , and all the things that challenge me .





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promiscuous-petal:

enough about sex positions has anyone discovered a reading position which doesn’t get uncomfortable after 5 minutes

(via girlsgetbusyzine)

Birthday outfit!

I made a cake that I know won’t get eaten because he doesn’t like cake but I refused to let a birthday happen that didn’t involve baking one.

Celebrating this guy today…. whenever the Navy decides to give him back.

Spending our afternoon outside in a plastic pink pool listening to the Cure and sort of enjoying the hot desert wind. Clem is enjoying nature.

I need season 3 of Bates right now and they won’t even start filming it until this fall.
Annoying. Netflix has ruined me for patience when it comes to shows.

When I was a student at Cambridge I remember an anthropology professor holding up a picture of a bone with 28 incisions carved in it. “This is often considered to be man’s first attempt at a calendar” she explained. She paused as we dutifully wrote this down. ‘My question to you is this – what man needs to mark 28 days? I would suggest to you that this is woman’s first attempt at a calendar.’ It was a moment that changed my life. In that second I stopped to question almost everything I had been taught about the past. How often had I overlooked women’s contributions?
Sandi Toksvig (via tomfjord, learninglog) (via triharrytops) (via brodrum) (via sirmorgan) (via windwrinkle) (via atarctica) (via th0sedamnyetis)

Today has been the worst but this happened and now I feel better. She is on day two of skipping her nap (and day a bazillion of waking up six times a night) so I think it’s catching up to her. It’s been a while and I missed this.

Today was a horrible day. So bad that even Derrick hated it. And he’s the most positive Mr Fix-it that ever lived.
So his solution was rum. Bottles and bottles of rum. I could marry him all over again.

On another note, it -stormed- here in San Diego. I saw lightning and nearly wrecked my car because I didn’t think SoCal knew how to do that! All the wild critters out there must be so thankful for this break from the drought!

I hope everyone’s day has been better than ours was.
It’s better now though. We made it better!

“Sometimes you just gotta throw money at shit, babe.”

When I was a brand new teenager I lived in St Louis and visited the city museum and like I somehow always did when exploring new places, found a piano. The thrill of making actual music with my own two hands was (and I suppose still is) so strong in me that it obliterated any sense of anxiety I may have had. It’s beautiful really. I have no memories of anxiety on this day just curiosity and boldness and ivory keys dancing underneath my underage fingertips. I sat down on a bench and kicked at the peddle and slowly pressed all the right keys to bring the soundtrack from Amelie to life. I played a couple songs and many strangers walked by, some stopping, one in particular noticing me and my underage hands.
He was much older than me. Nearly the age I currently am. He could drink and had finished college. He lived alone and he had driven himself to the museum. My mother was around the corner.
I wonder about him now. He was an adult and I was such a child. I didn’t know how to walk in heals or end an abusive relationship or keep my mouth shut. He gave me House of Leaves and placed a clementine on his coffee table before playing Eternal Sunshine for me because it was just the theme. I don’t know.
Nothing happened between us. It was a strange friendship. One for the books. One for the movies. He was drawn to my piano playing and he taught me about books and cult classics.

He was so significant when I was 14 and now it’s as if he never existed.
I wonder about him is all.